The past few weeks were somewhat different. I am thankful for so many things in my life, but for some reason I felt something was different. So many things are happening that a normal person would consider as bad. There are problems I hear other people are going through or some illness that some friends or family are battling with, which honestly are quite distressing. Have you ever felt the same feeling? A feeling that you cannot fully explain. Somehow you feel concerned, anxious, and lonely at times. It may have been the mother’s instinct kicking in, but it was really weird…
As for me, I was rushed to the emergency room twice within a span of a month!
I’m ok now. Don’t worry. I am just writing this blog post contemplating on what I feel about it. I am thinking of the many things that could have or would have happened if not for my strong gratitude of life and what it offers. God is truly great in everything that I do and in what I am. God was beside me in these both times. In both cases I have been struggling to find the strength to push forward and be successful at what I do.
I was down for 5 days from the most recent trip to the ER. I got to think of so many things. Let me share with you a couple of thoughts I got during this “break”.
You Are Not Alone
Have you heard of this song entitled “You Will Be Found”? Originally sung by Ben Platt and other artists on one of our favorite Broadway musicals called Dear Evan Hansen. My husband and I were sobbing the entire show. We both loved it and wanted to watch it all over again during that time we were in New York. In fact, a dear friend of ours watched it over nine times already! This song is also a favorite of my son. I think it uplifts his spirit too.
Such a good song! Most importantly, this one helped me realized that whatever you feel, whatever you are experiencing, either sick or resolving a problem, you are not alone. God is there guiding you, through your prayers or through someone else. In my case it was my husband and my children.
My husband was beside me during both times I was in the hospital. I know his mind may be in a different place at times thinking about the many different problems he has with work. But my husband somehow always manages to see the positive side of things. He would always try to smile and be playful so that I would smile too. He would always want to say sweet and corny things just to make me feel awkward and smile. He would hold my hand or stroke my hair to make me feel good. Believe me, it’s definitely hard to feel comfortable in the ER. I was there for more than ten hours waiting for a room in vain. We had to go back home because we could not get the care that I needed.
Actually, being home made me feel more comfortable. Seeing my kids hastened my recovery. They were the ones taking care of me with their sweet good byes when they go to school or by checking on me as soon as they come back home. Heading straight to my room, just to check how I was doing. My little one’s chubby cheeks and silly dance made me a thousand times more happy! During that time, God really worked His wonders through my family. And I felt it.
For my readers who are feeling the same. Let me share with you the favorite part of the song I mentioned to you about.
Well, let that lonely feeling wash away
Maybe there’s a reason to believe you’ll be okay
‘Cause when you don’t feel strong enough to stand
You can reach, reach out your hand
And oh, someone will coming running
And I know, they’ll take you home
Even when the dark comes crashing through
When you need a friend to carry you
And when you’re broken on the ground
You will be found
This song hits the spot for me. It’s so relatable that it even mentioned something I can associate to the time where my husband took me home after getting frustrated with the hospital and carried me to bed to make sure I feel well taken cared of.
I hope and pray that whatever you are going through right now you will be able to find God through prayers or through other people. Continue to be grateful with what you have. Be thankful for the life that you were given. And know for a fact that you will be found. You may feel lost or lonely at times, but life is so wonderful that whenever you feel down, you will be lifted up to the heights relative with the same depth that you felt when you were feeling down. Or lifted even higher… because you are loved, by God and by the people who you hold dear to your heart.
Your Strength is Your Heart
The other realization was just from last night. I posted on Instagram about how happy I am for finally getting back on my feet and doing the very things that I love, being a mother and a homemaker.
Getting better doesn’t just mean recovering form an illness. More importantly, getting better should mean being stronger and more positive. Find that very thing that inspires you to be better and do more!
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade!
My lemonade is composed of the little things I do at home – managing bills, taking care of my kids’ homework, making sure that all the requirements in their school are taken cared of. That’s what refreshes me. These little things give me little successes which in turn gives me so much joy.
I wish you the same happiness. It’s not easy looking for it at times, but may I suggest for you to try and go back to your purpose. Your purpose would direct you to who you are and what you really need to do. And this will instantly give you a sense of peace. With it you will have enough room for positivity and, hopefully, the happiness that you have been looking for. My purpose is my children and my husband. I find joy in seeing them happy. And just like what my husband would tell me, being a good father (in my case, a mother), requires you to be good to yourself too. So in the process of helping my family be the best they can be, I need to be good to myself too, it’s my responsibility to take care of the body that takes care of them.
Life is tough, so be strong for your purpose. If there are days that you think that make you feel that you don’t have any purpose at all, pray and ask for clarity of thought. Do something different, like travelling, or considering a new job, just to get a different perspective of life. This exactly happened to me when I was looking for my passion, and now having Neat Obsessions as my profession. Another possibility is to look for inspiration from the very talents that you may have. You’ll never know and you might just surprise yourself. As you do all these, always remember to be grateful to God. Be grateful that you are alive. Be happy because you get to experience the little things in life. In the process, I hope you will discover that your strength is just in your heart. Find your strength in your purpose in life.
Let me leave you with some more of You Will Be Found lyrics.
So let the sun come streaming in
‘Cause you’ll reach up and you’ll rise again
If you only look around
You will be found (You will be found)
You will be found (You will be found)
You will be found
Out of the shadows
The morning is breaking
And all is new, all is new
It’s filling up the empty
And suddenly I see that
All is new, all is new
You are not alone
It’s a good day today, Neatropolis! I am up and about now, so let’s conquer the week ahead, together!